Monkey Brain

Dear Rachael Ray,

I've been taking your advice and salting the water before putting in the pasta, since it's "the only chance to season the pasta," but I keep getting salt under my fingernails and it feels like I'm dragging my hands through sand. It's seriously hampering my cooking pleasure. You always seem so happy; do you have someone who comes during the commercial break to dig the salt out of your fingernails?

Sincerely,

Monkey Cook